Day #12: 1800

Whenever you decide to take on a challenge like being nice for one hundred days, you will be tested.

I was tested many times during the dating blog, and today, I was tested again.

A day that started out just fine immediately went downhill after a call from my grandmother.

Someone had called her looking for me.

That someone turned out to be a collection agency.

My mother had taken on paying my student loans, because she felt like paying for my education fell under her jurisdiction. I don't really talk about that a lot, because I feel like I'm admitting to be spoiled when I say that, and truthfully, I am. I'm lucky to have had her help.

Unfortunately, my mom has fallen under really tough times, and now she's no longer able to pay the remainder of the student loans. Also unfortunately, she's in a bit of denial about it, and so she missed two payments and now a collection agency needs the money from me--all the money--in two months.

Yes, there are payment plans where I pay less over a longer amount of time, but that would mean more interest and since I am now responsible for this debt, I'd like to get it paid off as soon as possible.

Eighteen hundred dollars.

Not a lot of money, but yes, a lot of money.

Money I don't have?

Yup, but still, it could be worse.

I wanted to scream and shout and blame and swear and beat up someone, but I'm determined to stick with the project.

Instead, I decided to get proactive.

If I get resourceful, and avoid throwing a pity party, I can have a large debt paid off in two months, and I can say that I contributed to paying for my own education.

If not, I get thrown in pauper's jail and dine on my own limbs.

(Hey, I never said I'd give up being dramatic.)

My Mom was really upset with herself. She was crying and apologizing. A few years ago I would have berated her for being irresponsible and for getting me into a mess.

Instead, I told her that paying for college should have been my job to begin with, and she had more than done her part. I thanked her for everything she'd done for me up to this point, and I told her I love her and that I would figure out a way to help myself out of this situation.

Then I got off the phone and screamed at the top of my lungs in my car.

It was time for a perspective check.

I could owe more money. I could be unemployed. I could have kids to support. I could be participating in a "Be a Bitch" challenge and have no friends as of...probably now.

The only thing that's bothering me is eighteen hundred dollars.

It could be worse.

That being said--

I better start figuring out how I'm going to bring home the bacon.

Eighteen hundred dollars worth of bacon.